我发现了一个非常简单易行的解决办法

    fun showDialog(){
    val dialog = Dialog(this@DialogActivity)
    dialog.requestWindowFeature(Window.FEATURE_NO_TITLE)
    dialog.setCancelable(false)
    dialog.setContentView(R.layout.custom_dialog)
    val txtTitle = dialog.findViewById<TextView>(R.id.txtTitle)
    val btn  = dialog.findViewById<Button>(R.id.button)

    btn.setOnClickListener {
        Toast.makeText(this,"test",Toast.LENGTH_SHORT).show()
    }
    txtTitle.setText("ali")
    dialog.show()

    val window = dialog.window
    window?.setLayout(WindowManager.LayoutParams.MATCH_PARENT,WindowManager.LayoutParams.WRAP_CONTENT)
}

这里其他的答案都说得通，但它不符合费边的要求。这是我的一个解决办法。这可能不是完美的解决方案，但对我来说很管用。它显示了一个全屏的对话框，但你可以在顶部、底部、左边或右边指定一个填充。

首先把它放在res/values/styles.xml中:

<style name="CustomDialog" parent="@android:style/Theme.Dialog">
    <item name="android:windowIsTranslucent">true</item>
    <item name="android:windowBackground">@color/Black0Percent</item>
    <item name="android:paddingTop">20dp</item>
    <item name="android:windowContentOverlay">@null</item>
    <item name="android:windowNoTitle">true</item>
    <item name="android:backgroundDimEnabled">false</item>
    <item name="android:windowIsFloating">false</item>
</style>

正如你所看到的，我有android:paddingTop= 20dp基本上是你需要的。android:windowBackground = @color/Black0Percent只是在color.xml中声明的颜色代码

res /价值/ color.xml

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<resources>
<color name="Black0Percent">#00000000</color>
</resources>

该颜色代码只是作为一个虚拟，以取代对话框的默认窗口背景与0%透明度的颜色。

接下来构建自定义对话框布局res/layout/dialog.xml

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<LinearLayout xmlns:android="http://schemas.android.com/apk/res/android"
    android:id="@+id/dialoglayout"
    android:layout_width="match_parent"
    android:background="@drawable/DesiredImageBackground"
    android:layout_height="match_parent"
    android:orientation="vertical" >

    <EditText
        android:id="@+id/edittext1"
        android:layout_width="match_parent"
        android:layout_height="wrap_content"
        android:singleLine="true"
        android:textSize="18dp" />

    <Button
        android:id="@+id/button1"
        android:layout_width="match_parent"
        android:layout_height="wrap_content"
        android:text="Dummy Button"
        android:textSize="18dp" />

</LinearLayout>

最后这是我们的对话框，它设置了使用dialog.xml的自定义视图:

Dialog customDialog;
LayoutInflater inflater = (LayoutInflater) getLayoutInflater();
View customView = inflater.inflate(R.layout.dialog, null);
// Build the dialog
customDialog = new Dialog(this, R.style.CustomDialog);
customDialog.setContentView(customView);
customDialog.show();

结论:我试图在名为CustomDialog的styles.xml中覆盖对话框的主题。它覆盖了对话框窗口布局，让我有机会设置填充和改变背景的不透明度。这可能不是完美的解决方案，但我希望它能帮助你…:)

只要给AlertDialog这个主题

<style name="DialogTheme" parent="Theme.MaterialComponents.Light.Dialog.MinWidth">
    <item name="colorPrimary">@color/colorPrimary</item>
    <item name="android:windowMinWidthMajor">90%</item>
    <item name="android:windowMinWidthMinor">90%</item>
</style>

    ...
    AlertDialog.Builder builder = new AlertDialog.Builder(getActivity());
    Dialog d = builder.create(); //create Dialog
    d.show(); //first show

    DisplayMetrics metrics = new DisplayMetrics(); //get metrics of screen
    getActivity().getWindowManager().getDefaultDisplay().getMetrics(metrics);
    int height = (int) (metrics.heightPixels*0.9); //set height to 90% of total
    int width = (int) (metrics.widthPixels*0.9); //set width to 90% of total

    d.getWindow().setLayout(width, height); //set layout

这里有一个简短的答案，对我来说是有效的(在API 8和API 19上测试)。

Dialog mDialog;
View   mDialogView;
...
// Get height
int height = mDialog.getWindow()
.getWindowManager().getDefaultDisplay()
.getHeight();

// Set your desired padding (here 90%)
int padding = height - (int)(height*0.9f);

// Apply it to the Dialog
mDialogView.setPadding(
// padding left
0,
// padding top (90%)
padding, 
// padding right
0, 
// padding bottom (90%)
padding);

上面的许多答案都很好，但没有一个对我完全有效。所以我结合@nmr的答案得到了这个。

final Dialog d = new Dialog(getActivity());
        //  d.getWindow().setBackgroundDrawable(R.color.action_bar_bg);
        d.requestWindowFeature(Window.FEATURE_NO_TITLE);
        d.setContentView(R.layout.dialog_box_shipment_detail);

        WindowManager wm = (WindowManager) getActivity().getSystemService(Context.WINDOW_SERVICE); // for activity use context instead of getActivity()
        Display display = wm.getDefaultDisplay(); // getting the screen size of device
        Point size = new Point();
        display.getSize(size);
        int width = size.x - 20;  // Set your heights
        int height = size.y - 80; // set your widths

        WindowManager.LayoutParams lp = new WindowManager.LayoutParams();
        lp.copyFrom(d.getWindow().getAttributes());

        lp.width = width;
        lp.height = height;

        d.getWindow().setAttributes(lp);
        d.show();